Embrace Dotted Journal

From Tee Club Decemeber 2021 
 
Wow! I can't believe it's already December again which means it's already been one year since I launched Bunny's Tee Club. This started as a way to make sure I draw atleast one illustration a month and a way to work out my feelings. It has become a way I communicate with the world about my experiences, about a month in time. I'm so honored by all the love and support Tee Club has received and blown away by how much it has grown. I'm forever grateful to everyone who has been part of Tee Club whether they own one design or all twelve. 

I still plan to continue it as cons are back but definitely need to get better at planning as November has shown with everything that could go wrong going wrong and thus I'm still working on shipping November's tees and this is three days late in terms of releasing the design so subscribers can choose their color and size. I'm so sorry for the delay and am so grateful for your patience and understanding that I'm just one woman doing all the things - although I've been bribing my dad with red bean pastries to help me fold and bag. 
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December is my birthday month and looking back at this past year, I did a lot of growing. Which at 31 I definitely thought world shattering growth was behind me but I'm not mad at it. I always knew I was different and I finally got answers getting diagnosed with Autism and ADHD this Summer which really became a turning point of really accepting myself by not trying to measure myself to ANYONE'S  standards be it society, academia, social media, even my family and friends. Things that never made sense to me that I kept trying to adopt? I let all of that go. I still struggle with being angry, both in general and towards people, but I've been steadily allowing myself to be angry, even raising my voice when I feel like I'm not being heard. 
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I've always acutely felt an internal dichotomy of two inner selves divided by what I want to do and what I have to do. I used to always see them as a child vs adult but for the first time, I see them as the same age, light and dark, where you can not have one without the other. Most of the time, therapy for me is explaining something that happened which made me feel a certain way and the therapist reminding me it's okay to feel because I used to (and still occasionally)  judge myself for feelings and thoughts I have because I wanted to be "good" and I felt like I can't be truly "good" when I have stabby feelings or angry feelings or even indifferent feelings. Maybe it's 31 years of carrying all of these expectations and trying to hide all the negative things that would be touted as things I should be ashamed or my therapist reminding me twice a month, every month since the Spring that "it's okay to feel" but fuck it, I like all my parts, both soft and dreamy as well as scary and psycho.  I hope this month's tee reminds you that all of you, is just you. We have light and dark in all of us and it is important to embrace both. 
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The alternate title for this design was 32 Buns because on the long sleeve version there are 11 Bunbuns on each sleeve + 10 in the front design meaning 11 + 11 + 10 = 32 because I turn 32 this year. For the sleeves, most of the Bunbuns are neutral face because my mind wanders off a lot and I just gaze off into the distance. 
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♡ A5 size dotted journal with ribbon bookmark, elastic band closure and pocket on inner back cover 
♡ 96 sheets of 100gsm bright white (192 pages) 
♡ Vegan faux leather cover with gold foil stamping
♡ Holo gilded edges